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fuchs: (RoLschräges Haus)
I am completely disoriented, without any reason to be so. And I don't have time or energy left over to pursue this. It's depressing. It's energizing. Puzzling and scattering my brain. So, so sad and meh, whatever, at the same time.
I want to flee, I want to be, I want to vanish and conquer.
It's not a very powerful feeling, more like silent drums in the background. But it's there and very consistently so. It's everywhere. I'm hungry, but I don't really want to eat anything. I want to run and curl up and sleep. Don't think about anything at all and work hard until I Flow.
Flee into fantasy, live profusely, vanish completely and conquer the sky, the world and myself.
Drum, drum, drum, drum.
Ideas standing behind me, beckoning my heart. Whispers in my dreams and drums, drums, drums.

1972

Jun. 22nd, 2007 06:28 pm
fuchs: (Lomoduo)
Life is funny that way. I asked Dad about 1972, because I've got to hold a presentation about the documenta 5 in that year, and he tells me, a tiny bit indignant, that he surely already told me that 1972 was the year the train he was in was stopped, and since he wore his Bundeswehr jacket and the long, wavy hair, a heavily armored police officer asked him for his papers... with the finger at the trigger and the barrel in Dads face.
No, he didn't tell me that. Or about olympia in munich, where some israelites got killed. He wasn't there, he was in Kiel, watching the other part of olympia, which really was near enough.
Somehow it's all so near now. RAF terrorism. And did you know that 1972 Die Sendung mit der Maus was invented? ABBA met, though they didn't call themselves that yet? And the first episode of Star Trek came to German television?
If you're dealing with history of any kind, but maybe with art history especially, where cultural trends and movements are of utmost importance, it's kinda creepy to look into a time where your own parents were young and rebellious. Creepy in a beautyful way, though. I think I would have liked Dad just fine if I'd have met him then.

**********

Schon komisch, irgendwie. Ich habe Papa gefragt, was ihm zu 1972 einfällt, weil ich über die documenta 5, die dann war, demnächst ein Referat halten soll. Und er sagt mir ein bißchen empört, dass ich ja wohl weiß, dass das das Jahr war, indem sein Zug angehalten wurde und er, da er seine Bundeswehrjacke und die langen, lockigen Haare trug, um seine Papiere gebeten wurde... mit vorgehaltener Waffe, der Finger am Abzug.
Nein, hat er mir nie erzählt. Oder über Olympia in München und die dort ermordeten Israeliten. Da war er nicht gewesen, aber am anderen Ende von Olympia, in Kiel, was nun wirklich nah genug ist.
Und ganz schnell wird das alles ganz nah. Die RAF. Und wusstet ihr, das 1972 die Sendung mit der Maus erfunden wurde? ABBA sich begegnete, auch wenn sie sich erst später so genannt haben? Und dass 1972 die erste Folge Star Trek im deutschen Fernsehen lief?
Wenn man sich mit Geschichte beschäftigt, speziell mit Kunstgeschichte, in der kulturelle Bewegungen und Trends so wichtig sind, ist es schon unheimlich, sich eine Zeit anzuschauen, in der die eigenen Eltern jung und rebellisch waren. Auf schöne Art, allerdings. Ich glaube, ich hätte Papa gemocht, wenn ich ihm damals begegnet wäre.

August 2018

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